(Plus: 5 Unusual Facts About ‘Forgiveness’ You’ve Likely Never Heard)
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In the darkened theatre and through a veil of tears I watched the drama unfold on the screen.
And I made a soul wish, a prayer that millions upon millions of people around this globe would see and feel what I am seeing and feeling at this moment, a true story of forgiveness of such magnitude as to be immeasurable.
For anyone stuck in the deep hole of being unable to forgive, this scene is the ultimate teacher. If a deed of this magnitude can be forgiven, even 35+ years after the fact, you can find it within you to forgive anyone, including yourself.
I would be hard pressed to imagine anything more horrendous than the deeds for which his victim granted this man forgiveness. But during this deeply moving scene, rather than focus on the deeds, we focus on how these two characters changed during the ensuing years.
In a moment I will tell you how you can see this scene too.
Forgiveness is a ‘Relationship Goal’ all of us could have. Did you know it is also one of the Universal Laws? These Laws are ‘Energies’ with which we can align our daily lives and thus bring about the changes we so fervently wish for.
And therein lies our hope.
Let me ask you; is there an incident, involving another person in your past, that holds you in an emotional prison every time it comes to mind? Be honest because what I am going to share with you can actually set you free from the suffering you may be enduring.
You can stuff these feelings down and become an expert of denial, but the damage is still eroding your soul. So if you are holding onto what you feel are “justified” emotions because someone hurt you and you can’t let go, read on.
5 Forgiveness Facts
The Basis For All Human Behavior Is LOVE
The feel-good emotions originate from feelings of being loved. The feel-bad emotions originate from feelings of lack of love. The common denominator is ‘love’.
Pour all the feel-good emotions into the top of a funnel and at the bottom tip of the funnel they are stripped down to the root from which all the others grow …Love
Pour all the feel-bad emotions into the top of a funnel and at the bottom tip of the funnel they are stripped down to the root from which all of these grow …Lack of love
There Is No Guilt and No Innocence
Everyone, let me repeat, everyone on this planet suffers emotional pain. There is plenty to go around. We all, at times, act out from that source of pain. We don’t understand that this is what we are doing. We are simply reacting to feeling unloved.
In most cases, when we indulge in this behavior, we inadvertently hurt someone else.
So you can be assured that if you can’t forgive someone who caused you emotional suffering, there is someone who can’t forgive you for causing him or her pain. We are all in this together. There is no one who has not caused someone else to suffer in some way.
The Two Big R’s: Revenge and Righteousness
So why then, do you continue to hang onto and savor the pain you think someone deliberately injected into you, like a dose of poison?
Because you believe that if you admit you did something wrong or bad, you will feel lack of love and the result is feeling powerless which takes the form of ‘guilt’. So, for emotional protection, you have to remain righteous.
There are even those of us who think if we enact revenge, we will clean the slate, that two wrongs will make a right.
We enter very dangerous waters in this case. Now it becomes deliberate. It invites escalation and there is no better example of this danger than in the constant wars in which this planet indulges. Big war, little war, it’s all the same. There is never a ‘winner’.
You can’t let go because then you think you’ll have no power, when, in fact, the exact opposite is true. You have actually taken your power (control of self) back.
Ask yourself,”Do I want to be free or do I want to be right?”
Perhaps ‘Forgive’ Is The Wrong Word
For many of us, ‘forgive’ means to exonerate, absolve of responsibility or let someone off the hook. When in reality, no human being has the power to undo what has been done.
We all have to live with our behavior and its consequences. There is another law, the Law of Attraction, which brings the energies we impose on others back to us.
Why not make that energy one of understanding? Think of how you feel when someone tells you they understand?
Understanding is not absolving someone of what they did. It is you knowing that at the very least, they acted out of the pain of lack of love, which you can title with any of the feel-bad emotions.
You know what it feels like to feel unloved. Empathy has huge healing power.
Perhaps you will have the opportunity to engage in a conversation with this person (as happened during the scene in my theatre experience) and further understand where they were coming from at the time and that it really had nothing to do with you, but was a reaction to another incident in their lives or a complete misunderstanding.
Time Heals, It Really Does
We are here to grow. We all change with time.
If you are carrying pain from an incident that occurred a long time ago, you are stuck in limbo, a purgatory on Earth. And you deserve better.
Neither you nor the other party involved is the same as you were at that time. They may not even be aware of something they did or said that affected you in this way. Come to an understanding, either with them in conversation or in your own mind with the aid of what has been written here.
The incredibly moving scene that affected me so much is near the end of the movie “The Railway Man”, starring Oscar winners Colin Firth (The King’s Speech) and Nicole Kidman.
It is my belief and the belief of millions of others, that wherever it is we go when we leave this earth, there is only one emotion; unlimited, unconditional love. Love, is the ultimate healer.
I believe we are here to learn about love, to receive it, to give it, to live without it at times, to feel it’s tremendous power at others and most of all, to learn how to give it to ourselves.
Pain vs. love. Which one do you want to feel, give and be in the circumference of? I don’t know anyone who consciously chooses pain. Align yourself with the Universal Law of Forgiveness (Understanding) and you’ll attract much more love into your life.
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